Tag Archives: unlikeable

Expectations and perfection

Over the past few weeks I have been struggling with my perceptions of myself. I have struggled not to return some of my old thinking patterns around being unlikeable and unlovable.

It has led me to a lesson about the expectations of ourselves that I would like to share with you.

So first, an exercise and I need you to be really really honest with yourself please:

1. Get a pen and paper and write a list of all the expectations you have of yourself.

Done it? Got everything? Are you sure you’ve been honest?

2. Work out the person you care most about. If possible they should be an adult and not a child but if all else fails use a child. Write a list of all your expectations of them.

3. Compare the lists. Which is longer? I suspect your expectations of yourself.

So think about it.

If your expectations of others are so much less than those of yourself, what do you think their expectations of you are – the long or the short list?

I’m sure the short list.

So where are all these expectations coming from? Are you really expecting to be perfect? Do you really need them all.

What would happen if you dropped enough items off the list to have it as short as the other one – what would your life be like then?