Last night I caught up on the latest series of My Mad Fat Diary on Channel 4.
I blogged about this when it first came out
My Mad Fat Diary takes a look at life from the perspective of funny, music-mad 16-year-old Rae.
What the write up doesn’t say is Rae has been in a mental health institution for self harm. She has countless self-esteem issues because of her weight.
Last night I watched Episode 6 where she found the diary of her best friend Chloe who had run away from home. She always thought Chloe had everything, the looks, the loving family, the popularity and the confidence.
As she read the diary she realised that Chloe was just as screwed up and insecure as her. She learnt that Chloe wished she could be more like her best friend. That she felt different, isolated.
Rae got cross at the suggestion she might be self-centred. She wasn’t self-centred – she was self-absorbed. She made the mistake we all make. We assume that it’s only us that is screwed up and everyone else is ok.
We are all screwed up, we just spend so much time caught up in our own struggles that we often fail to notice the struggles of those around us
It was a powerful series again and it certainly triggered a lot of a stuff in me. It also helped me see how far I have come that the stuff it triggered was not as painful as it used to be and it didn’t bring me down.
These days I can see the struggles that other people are having and I know you don’t have to be screwed up for life. This is different from the beliefs of society. Everyone seems to believe that you just need to learn to live with your pain. I’ve heard it said so often. It was said on the Mad Fat Diary, I’ve heard it said about kids that have had a screwed up childhood and I’ve heard people say it about themselves. But you see I know a secret – I know it’s simply not true. Nothing needs to be the way it’s always been.
When you get a moment, try stepping out from the world in your head and look around at the people you care about. Ask yourself
“If they were as screwed up as me, if they were struggling with something right now, what might they be struggling with?”
or alternatively, next time someone says or does something the makes you feel bad about yourself, ask instead
“If this was not about me but a struggle they were having, what might it be about?”
I can help with whatever is getting in the way of you being everything you can be. I can help online via Skype or Facetime or face to face if can travel to Dundee or Aberdeen just drop an email to firstname.lastname@example.org to find out how.