Be in their moment, don’t hide from it

IMG_1504[1]One day we were in the changing rooms of the swimming baths and I was telling my daughter not to open the door to our cubicle as we got changed. She piped up:

Don’t worry mummy, your belly covers your bits

It was true. It was an innocent statement made by her based on what she saw. Not based on any form of judgement.

These days I am comfortable enough in my own skin that I don’t care. I smiled and told her she made a good point and we carried on laughing and giggling as we got changed.

In the past that might have caused me a problem. But my weight doesn’t define me. And it’s changing. I’m changing.

How I look doesn’t matter to her.

What I do doesn’t matter to her.

All that matters to her is how I make her feel.

When she looks back on photos and reflects on memories when she’s older, it won’t be what size I was that she remembers. It will be what she was doing and how she felt.

My daughter knows that beauty on the inside is way more important than beauty on the outside. My daughter knows we are all different and that’s what makes people interesting and amazing.

She doesn’t care what size I am or if I have make up on. She doesn’t even care if we have a hug when I have just got back from a run and am hot and sweaty!

She doesn’t care if the photo we’ve just taken together shows me with a double chin. What she sees is her mum and she loves me. What she sees is how much fun we were having as she remembers what we were doing at the time.

We are not remembered for what we do. We are remembered for how we make people feel.

So next time you try and hide from that photo or cringe at a comment made by your kid that makes you self-conscious – remember that. Be in their moment, don’t hide from it. You might regret it later in your life if you do.

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